My ethnic background is from the asian subcontinent so this post is more directed toward that culture, although it can be still be applied to others, as many of them of them are similar in nature.
Have a simple wedding. Simple as that.
Do not try to become lavish and extravagant because wallahi it will only testify against you on the day of judgement. What good is spending with £25,000 on a wedding? This excess extravagance just comes down to people trying to show off.
The funny thing is, I read this case study by a non-muslim psychologist who claimed that people who spend more money on weddings are more likely to divorce. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, it’s not about that one day. I know of a brother who spent £50,000 on his wedding, he even hired a personal helicopter for the wedding day to mark his grand entry, and a couple of months later, he divorced her. What good did all that money do?
It’s ironic that most muslims from the asian subcontinent take part in all these other ceremonies as well like the mehndi, sinifan (or whatever they’re called), which originated from the Indian culture, so why is it that muslims want to take part in such acts and add unnecessary costs to their lives?
Friends of mine told me how they’ve had family members arguing with each other over who should be doing what, which resulted in the families never talking to each other again. Extravagance in this is like asking yourself to be put under shaytaan’s control.
Have a plain wedding and keep it strict to the Sunnah. When you live to please Allah, you will see the barakah in everything. Think about it like this, in current times, the divorce rates are amongst the highest ever and I honestly believe that it is partly to do with this because it builds a false persona of marriage and it gives the impression that life is like a fairy tale. Think back to your grandparents, did they have such a wedding? They’ve been married for over 40+years whereas now it’s hard to keep one for two years. Obviously, this is not the only factor but it is one of the main factors.
Simplicity will save you thousands, if not, tens of thousands. Personally, I would rather use that money on my spouse and take them on a holiday, which is a more productive use of that money then the nonsense of having a big hall with mediocre food, along with some fancy clothes which I am never going to wear ever again.
Especially sisters, I ask you, for the sake of Allah, focus on pleasing him and believe me, he will never let you down. Do not let the dunya take over your heart because it will not come with you to the grave.